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Dear TJ,
You have to stop running away from us in public places! We bought you some new sneakers on Wednesday night, and you had fun running up and down the shoe aisle. You tried to round a corner, but when we warned you to stay where we could see you, you grudgingly complied.
But the next day, Grandma Kitty and Grandma Debbie took you to get some pizza after school. Grandma Kitty said that, when you got out of the bathroom, you ran off from her and into the other room. She was so scared she’d lost you! It was scary to me when she told me later, because I thought we’d had this talk before.
When Grandma Kitty brought you home that afternoon, we ended up having another serious talk. You didn’t want to listen. But TJ, if you run away from us in a store, a restaurant, or anywhere that isn’t home, somebody could take you and we’d never see you again! I didn’t want to traumatize you with reality, but I did have to make it scary enough for you to understand. There are some bad people out there who like to hurt little boys, and if we don’t know where you are, one of them could find you and take you before we even knew what happened. You have to stay with us, at least where we can see you!
It’s hard for you to understand as a 3 year old, and I know that it’s not always a stranger that wants to do bad things to kids, but the reality of the situation is too complex for you right now. So we have to keep it simple, and you need to stay with a grown up you can trust at all times!
Love,
Mommy
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That’s me: Christina Gleason. I’m a writer, editor, and disability advocate. I'm a multiply disabled autistic lady doing my best in this world built for abled people. I’m a geek for grammar, fantasy, and casual gaming. I hate vegetables. I cannot reliably speak, so I’ll happily conduct business over email or messaging instead.
oh its so frustrating isn’t it – and so scary too. You are doing exactly the right things – talking to TJ and reminding him of the simple facts – it gets too confusing to cloud their memories with lots of details – just keep it simple and straight – when he starts asking questions – why?? you can then start to go into some detail then.
here is mine for this week!
http://dearpeeps.blogspot.com/2009/04/easter-hugs.html
have a wonderful Easter break
I think this is a cute idea! I just finished mine. Here is the link:
http://uniquefamilylife.blogspot.com/2009/04/dear-kid-saturday.html
Sorry that TJ has given you more scares by running off from adults. Our little guy likes to do this as well.
Here is mine for this week: http://www.theangelforever.com/?p=1122
I’m back to lettering just on a new blog. I can’t even imagine how scary it must be for your baby to run off. I’m not looking forward to that talk at all.
http://eclecticmommy.com/?p=32
I also find it scary when my kids run away in public—or worse, hide from me! That leads to a very serious talk.
I tell them they have to stay where they can see me, not where I can see them. They know if they can see me, but may not be able to effectively gauge whether I can see them or not. Just a thought.
Thanks for all of the replies!
Heidi, yes! I told him that he needs to be able to see me at all times, because that means I should be able to see him. I hope it sunk in.
SO scary. We’re dealing with that one too. Nicely handled, mama!
Here’s mine for the week: http://macaroniandglue.blogspot.com/2009/04/dear-kid-saturday_11.html
This is cute! My daughter also runs away – they move fast for little folks!
Sounds fun.
Mike
http://somethingaboutparenting.typepad.com
Twitter: AboutParenting