Own It: Stop Holding Yourself Back

Jason Falls is our keynote speaker this morning. He can’t start us out with a shot of bacon-infused Maker’s Mark like he does at other speaking engagements.

Own It. Stop Holding Yourself Back.

He’s showing us a picture of a t-shirt he’d worn that says “As Seen in Porn,” and his t-shirt today says “Stop Staring at my Boobies.” (It has a picture of the birds, the blue-footed boobies. You may know him as “the t-shirt guy.”

When you spark controversy and call people out, you get people to pay attention to you. Jason did this by calling the speakers at an early SMX conference out for spending every session telling everyone how to game the system, in a post entitled “Duping Digg Hot Topic at SMX Social Media.”

But you can’t stop there. It’s about more than upsetting the apple cart from time to time. Some of us (myself included) blog for validation. He’s talking about a reason for being, self-confidence, but I’m hearing “Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.” You don’t have to follow all of the “social media marketing rules.” Be yourself. Talk about your kids. Talk about your politics or your religion. Use humor. Jason doesn’t have a line.

Sometimes you can be sad and share your pain. (Some of us do this more than others.) Brene Brown did a TED Talk about “The Power of Vulnerability,” in which she talks about how showing people your vulnerable side helps you make a connection with your readers and your followers.

“In order for connection to happen, we have to let ourselves be seen.” – Dr. Brene Brown

We gravitate toward those we identify with. Robert Scoville, Jenny Lawson, David Sedaris, Keanu Reeves, and Kelby Carr are all examples of people who have fans who are fans because they identify with them.

Who Do You Want To Identify with YOU?

And why? (Me? I want to have my fellow disabled people identify with me so we can both commiserate and help lift each other up.)

“The the story of who you are with your whole heart.” – Brene Brown

Even if you know that what you are about to share might be polarizing, that’s what you want.

Ask yourself:

  • Am I sharing my true self? (My psychiatrist would love this.) There may be repercussions to doing so, but it can be necessary.
  • What do I hold back? Why? (Jason’s wife holds back on things she would otherwise say if not for the fact that she doesn’t want to disappoint your mom.)
  • What do I wish I could talk about? Why don’t I?
  • What’s my biggest secret? Do others share it? It doesn’t have to be a negative secret.
  • Who matters to me the most? Will it hurt them? Can it help them, too?

“This thing about you that you think is your flaw – it’s the reason I’m falling in love with you.” – Colleen Hoover

Don’t always second-guess yourself and talk yourself out of things. People love that you’re not perfect, because they’re not perfect either.

We need validation in order to give ourselves permission to be ourselves. We need the intrinsic value of feedback from our audiences and our loved ones. Be bold and be you. Don’t be ashamed of being you.

Blog like nobody’s reading.
Blog for you.
The rest will take care of itself.

Christina Gleason (970 Posts)

That’s me: Christina Gleason. I’m a professional copywriter, editor, and blogger. My company is called Phenomenal Content. (Hire me!) I’m a relatively high-functioning Aspie who also lives with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS), depression, anxiety, and chronic pain. I am not ashamed to admit that I am in the care of a psychiatrist, who assures me that people in therapy are often better adjusted than “normal” people who are not, because at least we know what our issues are and are working on them. I’m a geek for grammar, fantasy, and select types of gaming, including World of Warcraft and Empire: Four Kingdoms. I hate vegetables. I have an intense phone phobia, so I’ll happily conduct business over email or IM instead.


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