Don Jackson described his session this way on our conference schedule:
Don had asked us for volunteers in the Facebook group. Those who volunteered passed. The rest of us failed. We are imposters. All of us have felt like imposters at some point. We all feel like we’re not “doing enough.” It’s hard not to be afraid.
What is Imposter Syndrome?
Impostor phenomenon, better known as Imposter Syndrome, isn’t an official diagnosis listed in the DSM. It gets worse by not dealing with it.
What is the Cause of Imposter Syndrome?
You!
We have a disjunction that exists between self-assessment and our actual abilities.
Look back, ask, and find out WHY?
Identify where the self-doubt is coming from.
Imposter feelings have a way of festering silently for a long time with the difficulty of accurate self-assessment and the social stigma of asking for help.
Deal with it by acknowledging the why and letting it go.
Be brutally honest. Never lie to your therapist, and never lie to yourself. Don’t listen to your worst critic.
You Are Not Alone
Lots of celebrities – politicians, actors, musicians, scientists, etc – they suffer through the same feelings. Some of them have clinical mental disorder diagnoses, too. Carrie Fisher was my favorite person on the list Don scrolled through, because she did own her stuff.
You have to be your biggest fan, to give yourself permission to say, “I am good enough. I deserve this.”
You have to believe in yourself before brands are going to hire you.
How to Get Past the Noise
Have an accountability partner.
- Get affirmations from them.
- Play the “3 year old questioning game.”
Keep track of compliments you receive and focus on accepting rather than blowing off praise.
Take some time in the morning for 5 minutes of quiet self-reflection.
And this is important: recognize that feeling incompetent and being incompetent are two different things.
Lastly…be honest with yourself! No BS!
Be the You That You Were Meant to Be
“Gentlemen, we are going to relentlessly chase perfection, knowing full well we will not catch it, because nothing is perfect. But we are going to relentlessly chase it, because in the process we will catch excellence. I am not remotely interested in just being good.” – Vince Lombardi
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